Prussian Bunnies And Concentrating Russians
by OfStrangeShadows
Summary: The latex, panty-styled shorts were extremely tight and the cuff-links around his wrists and neck were slightly itchy. But the bunny ears and torn, fishnet stocking were comfortable. "Not ignoring me now, are ya?" Oneshot. First ever lemon. For Evil Itay


**A/N:** I love my reviewers. I really do. I especially love Evil Italy. :D Here's your oneshot, dear. (That wasn't creepy right? XD)

Just to let you know: I usually don't write about this pairing or the characters. Please excuse my mistakes on them! :D

And there is really no plot in this. XD

_**Thanks to RonriiManda, who told me that Prussia isn't German, he's Prussian. XD**_

* * *

It had been three hours. Three fucking long _hours_ since anyone finally had texted him back. And, of all people, it had to be Romano Vargas.

_Shut the fuck up, Potato Bastard._

_We're busy with errands._

_Bother someone else._

So people were ignoring the AWESOME Prussia because of something as stupid as fucking _errands_! Even West, who usually would never leave his brother alone if he kept texting him for three hours straight, was out getting stuff done. _Well_, Prussia decided as he flopped down on his bed, _it sure does suck not to be a country anymore_. But he did not sulk (_The Awesomeness never sulks!_) because he was struck with an amazing idea that would certainly clear his boredom. He knew that Russia didn't have anything planned today. (_How he knew is still in question._) Prussia clapped his hands together and rubbed, time to visit the north.

Okay, so the north was a lot colder than he thought it was going to be. Tightening the scarf around his neck, he began to jog down the _freakishly long_ entryway of the Russian's home. Just a few more seconds of walking and he'd be at the front door. Just a few more seconds. Or a minute. Oh, who was he kidding? This was gonna take him _forever_.

R * U * S * S * I * A

Russia frowned as his fourth pen ran out of ink. He didn't mind paperwork, truly he didn't, but the wasting of his perfectly fine pens bothered him a little. He watched as it rolled off of the side of his desk and into the wastebasket below. Paperwork was boring, but it needed to be done. Taking out another pen, he began on the next stack of paperwork waiting for him.

P * R * U * S * S * I * A

Gilbert could've cried when he saw the front door to the Russian's house, really he could have. But, instead of crying and doing other un-manly things, he dashed to the door and forced it open with a shoulder and thigh. The warmth that flooded over every one of his senses was welcomed and appreciated. Gilbert sighed in relief and shredded off the articles of winter clothing, leaving them next to the door. Screw cleanliness, he wasn't his house anyway.

The albino made his way through several hallways when he finally found a door that could resemble one that led into an office. It was ajar and the ex-nation peered in through the tiny crack and saw a mahogany desk and a _huge-ass Russ_- Russia working on his paperwork. The silver-haired man waltzed into the room and declared his entrance, "I thought I should _bless_ you with my presence!"

The Russian didn't even look up.

Prussia allowed an annoyed look to cross his features before he replaced it with a smug grin.

"Too awestruck by my awesomeness?" No response. Prussia pressed his lips together before strutting up to the Russian's desk. He gripped the edge of the pen and tried to pull it free but the taller man easily kept him from doing so. The albino then tried to bother the amethyst eyed nation by poking him until he looked up, but the man refused to do so. Prussia, extremely annoyed by his vain attempts, finally said, "Why aren't you _doing_ anything!"

The Russian finally looked at the albino, "I am trying very hard to finish this before dinner. If you do not stop bothering me, I will have to get my pipe. You want this to happen, da?"

"As if you could-" Prussia's mouth shut on its own accord when the Russian stood up and walked around his desk. He grabbed the shorter man by the back of his shirt, lifted him into the air, walked over to the door and threw him from the room.

"Please do not bother me."

Russia then shut the door.

"That was so un-awesome! NO ONE can ignore the awesome Prussia!"

That was when the red eyed nation was struck with another idea.

R * U * S * S * I * A

Ah, silence. Russia enjoyed silence. Especially when he was doing paperwork. He was just about to finish another document when a soft click signaled that someone had entered and shut the door. Without looking up, Russia knew that it was the albino ex-nation. It was only obvious that the shorter man would come back. There was silence for a moment. Russia could hear steps being taken to his desk, but did not look up. However, he did tilt his head upward when a pale arm shot out and swiped away _every_ _single document_ he had been working on.

The sight that greeted him was very unexpected.

P * R * U * S * S * I * A

It hadn't really been hard to find the outfit. (_Don't ask him how he knew where to buy it. One day he had gotten drunk and just thought it would be the funniest thing ever to buy it. Or why he had it on him. Prussia just didn't make sense. Not even to himself._) The latex, pantie-styled shorts were extremely tight and the cuff-links around his wrists and neck were slightly itchy. But the bunny ears and torn, fishnet stocking were comfortable.

When Russia looked up at him, he knew that the taller nation was angry. But the anger on his face melted as soon as he saw the man in front of him. Prussia, with a smirk and a triumphant tone to his voice, spoke.

"Not ignoring me now, are ya?"

R * U * S * S * I * A

Russia couldn't fathom a reason why the man dressed like that, but he found that he didn't particularly care. Standing up, he walked around the desk and pulled the albino against him.

"Зачем вы пытаетесь меня соблазнить привлечь мое внимание?"_[Why would you try to seduce me to get my attention?] _He asked in his native tongue, wrapping a strong arm around the sexily dressed man in front of him. The Prussian tried to fight off the red coming to his cheeks at the husky way the Russian was speaking, even though knowing none of what he had said, but failed entirely. "Ну он работал."_[Well it has worked.]_ The Russian tilted Gilbert's head upward and captured his lips in a simple, short kiss. Then, almost as if someone had flipped a switch, the Russian had the Prussian on the desk; hands roaming over the pale expanse of skin available to him. Gilbert, confused, tried to fight off the Russian's advances, but had his arms held above his head and pinned to the wood. The Russian removed his mouth from the shorter man's and began to kiss and suck and _bite_ at the skin on the Prussian's neck.

"S-Stop!"

"No. You have started what cannot be stopped."

One of Russia's hands found its way to Gilbert's torso and tweaked a nipple, causing Gilbert to let out a muffled moan.

P * R * U * S * S * I * A

Oh_ fuck_- He knew that dressing up the way he did would cause a reaction, but he didn't expect this kind of reaction! Although the the touches and licks and sucks and bites felt amazing, he really couldn't let the Russian do this to him. He was Prussia! He was the one that was supposed to make the other resort to a puddle of goo! Not the other way around!

But when Russia's hand slipped inside of the latex shorts he wore, every resolve he had flew out the window. His teeth sunk into his bottom lip and Gilbert tried not to allow a loud moan from escaping. The larger hand, now around his cock, slowly began to stroke him. Prussia's hands searched for something, _anything_, to grab onto. His nails dug themselves into the wood beneath his fingers. How long had it been since he had another person do this for him? A bit too long.

R * U * S * S * I * A

Russia very much loved the reaction that he pulled from the little German when he began to move his hand. He stroked at the man's need as he began to strip himself of his clothing with a bit of difficulty. (_Yes, Russia was very talented. He could remove his clothing with one hand._) With several long strokes and a bite to his neck, Gilbert's seed was on both of their stomachs. The taller man chuckled as the shorter tried to catch his breath. Once he could breathe correctly again, he spoke.

"Fuck you."

"I am just about to, мой маленький зайчик."_[My little bunny.] _

The way the Prussian's eyes widened at that really pleased the inner sadist in him. (_Perhaps the sadist wasn't just inner._)

The Russian removed the shorts on the short man and tossed them somewhere behind himself. Pushing himself up onto his desk, he hovered over the albino and gently, almost lovingly, kissed him. Pulling away, he stretched to open a drawer beneath them. Pulling out a bottle, he popped open the cap and-

"You keep lube in your desk?"

"It comes in handy."

"When?"

He coated his fingers, rubbed them them together to warm it, and gently began to trace the pale man's puckered entrance. The ex-nation's breath hitched.

"Now, perhaps?"

Russia waited for a few seconds before inserting a finger into the Prussian beneath him.

P * R * U * S * S * I * A

It wasn't as if it _hurt_, it just felt strange. The Russian above him began to pepper kisses on him, trying to distract the albino from the intrusion. Waiting for a few, long seconds, Ivan then inserted another finger. Waiting several second, he began to make scissoring motions inside of the man. Feeling him become loose around him, he added another long finger before taking out the digits and putting something much bigger at his entrance. (_When had he gotten his pants off? Geez, Prussia just wasn't all there today._)

"Relax." It was an order. Gilbert tried his hardest to keep his body relaxed, but when you've got a huge Russian towering over you, ready to fuck you senseless, it's a bit hard to relax.

R * U * S * S * I * A

Ivan, sensing the Prussian's uneasiness, tilted the man's head upward and pressed a kiss to his mouth. He repeatedly did so, the kisses becoming more intense as one more was added. Once he thought the albino was distracted enough, he pushed himself through the tight ring of muscle until he was fully sheathed. Waiting for the silver haired man beneath to give him a sign he could move, it was hard to control his own patience. The heat was so ama-

Gilbert nodded and Russia forgot about his musings.

P * R * U * S * S * I * A

After the pain had subsided, he couldn't really think coherently. He could just feel. And hear. Before he even knew what had been happening, the tight knot of heat in his stomach unwound and white took over his entire vision.

R * U * S * S * I * A

"You're going to hurt."

"Yeah, yeah, I know."

"Tomorrow you are going to be cleaning my entire office."

"What! But you just said I'm going to hurt!"

"Yes I know. But, you were the one that had to get my attention by messing up my papers. So you are cleaning."

"Fuck!"

"Again!"

Prussia really tried to ignore how excited the Russian sounded.

* * *

**A/N: **That...That was such fail. OTL

I've never written RussiaxPrussia before. Or a lemon. God, I fail. I'M SO SORRY FOR THIS CRAP! *Hides in corner of shame.*

But, Evil Italy wanted me to write this for her in response to her guessing who Alice was as a country in Eternal Summer Skin. She wanted it to go a little something like this:

**Russia was busy doing what ever it is countries do(paperwork?) in his office. Prussia is really bored and everyone is out because they`re doing errands or whatever, so now he has no one to bug. But he then remembers Russia is home and decides to go bother him. He goes into Russia`s office but Russia doesn't pay any attention to him. After a few (annoying)attempts to get Russia`s attention, Russia just throws him out of the room. After muttering to himself about how un-awesome that was and that NO ONE can ever ignore the awesome Prussia, Prussia then gets an idea that was sure to get the Russian`s attention. When the door to his office opens again, Russia doesn't look up from his work and just pretends to not notice Prussia. At least, that`s until all of his papers are pushed to the floor. Russia finally looks up to let the Prussian know he`s not happy with that all but stops whatever it was he was going to say when he sees Prussia in(something sexy with bunny ears and a bunny tail XD). "Not ignoring me now, are ya?"**

**And I think you know where its supposed to go from there~**

I hope you liked it! I doubt you did though. OTL

I'm so sorry! D:

Fail ending is fail.

Review on my horrible-ness?


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